Tag Archives: friendship

Can You Relate?

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Relate-Womens-Ministry-1

I want to share something that I am SO excited to be a part of. Recently I was at a baby shower with a few women from my church. We spent the entire time talking and laughing and sharing stories. It was a wonderful time connecting with some of the women that I know, but didn’t know well.

A couple of us started talking later about how we needed to try and do things like that more often. I have said before that community is so important to me and being surrounded by other women (in person) was such a gift. How could we foster that type of community in our local church?

My friend Steph has had a heart for seeing some sort of Women’s Ministry at our church form and even had the perfect name for it…Relate! A place that we could gather together as one and find all those common ways that we can relate to one another.

So we are taking a leap of faith and moving forward and Relate Women’s Ministry was born!

God gave me some words to try and express our heart behind this ministry and I wanted to share those here. Friends if you are in the Marshall MN area and want to join me for our first “event” – please let me know!! I would love to have you join us!

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I don’t know about any of you…but Sunday mornings can be pretty stressful around our house. Heck any morning can be pretty stressful. Getting everyone out the door on time, without fighting can be a challenge can’t it?

So let me just say congratulations on even being here today!

But can I be honest for a minute? I am pretty intimidated by all of you. I desperately want for you to believe that I have it all together, as though that belief would make you like me more…but the reality is that there are some Sunday mornings that I am screaming in the car on the way to church.

Can anyone relate?

Maybe you are a mom to small children and it feels like you have changed 1000 diapers too many and you just want to have an adult conversation for 5 minutes.

Maybe all of your children are grown and out of the house and you are wondering what your purpose is now?

Maybe you are single and you wonder if you will ever get married?

Or you are struggling in your marriage and you feel like you are the only one who isn’t seeing life through rose colored glasses…

Can anyone relate?

God is pretty clear about how He feels about community. He created us to be in community together, to support one another and to lift each other up.

Hebrews 10:24-25 “And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near.”

Galatians 6:2 “Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ”

Matthew 18:20 “For where two or three are gathered in my name, there am I among them.”

A few of us have been talking about how we can create a community for the women of Swan Lake. A safe place where we can meet and find laughter, encouragement, and lift one another up. A place where there is no judgement or comparisons but instead a time where we can share stories and just relate to one another. Find that common ground that IS there between all of us!

A place for all women. For the mothers and the singles, the empty nesters and the retirees. If you are a women (sorry guys) we extend an invitation for you to join us. Because this is new we don’t have everything figured out yet…but if you have a heart for this type of ministry we encourage you to join us and bring your ideas.

We are hoping to gather together once a month, on a Friday night or Saturday morning for a few hours. We will have an activity and a devotion and a time of fellowship. I know that there are several women here that I don’t know well and I am guessing the same could be said for many of you. We want to change that and are hoping that this is the place to start!

So for our first “event” we will be showing the movie “Mom’s Night Out” here at the church on Friday May 1st. It is a funny movie and one that all women, regardless of where they are in life, can relate to. Come ready to laugh and eat some popcorn and enjoy some fellowship with other women!

Feel free to bring a friend too! All women are welcome!

Unconventional Friendships – An (in)Courage Guest Post!

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Incourage Friendship Post

Just under 6 short years ago a website was born who’s heart and mission it was to encourage women, gather them together, and equip them to serve well where God had planted them. That site is (in)courage and was one of the first community sites that I started reading after I started blogging myself.

Each morning a post would fill my inbox that gave me hope, brought me laughter and helped me feel like I wasn’t alone. You see making friends hasn’t ever been easy for me. I tend to isolate. And so having a little piece of friendship in my inbox each morning was such a  gift.

And so today it is with excitement and honor that I get to share a little of my journey to some “unconventional” friendships on the (in)courage site. I would love to have you join me there. While some of my dearest friendships have come in an unexpected way, it has reminded me that God can and will use any situation to gather His daughters together!

Because God knew my secret longings for friendship, and He provided it in the most unconventional way…(<====Click to Tweet)

And if you haven’t already been receiving the emails from (in)courage every day – sign up here so that you too can receive these free daily emails of encouragement in your inbox! You will be glad that you did! 🙂

When Laughter Lifts Spirits

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Laughter

I had the joy of attending a baby shower yesterday for a sweet new mama. This is her first child and it can be scary. Several of us from our small group joined together to have this shower and it was such fun.

Nancy hosted and made the yummiest of treats. I ate 3 of her filo cups at the shower (I was trying to be super polite) …I could have had 50. They were THAT good. They were these little filo dough cups filled with cheese and mayo and bacon and tomato. YUM!!

I digress….

I had an idea for the cake and was scheduled to do the frosting and then my kids got the stomach flu (YUCK)…so my friend Steph offered to take care of it for me, which was such a blessing.

They did such a good job. It was so adorable! And their story about how it all came together (or almost didn’t) was HILARIOUS. I was laughing just hearing it.

I needed that laughter yesterday.

I said it before but I have found myself in a tough season. It has been a struggle and while I have felt God’s presence so clearly, it is still hard. I haven’t found myself laughing much, and sometimes it is just what we need.

We spent almost 3 hours laughing and sharing stories.

Joy, our youth pastor’s wife, shared the devotional and gave the best “10 things to do to go crazy” list. Dave Letterman doesn’t have anything on this woman. So so good. Everything was written to be sarcastic and we were roaring through it. Like “When you are feeling down about yourself, go onto Facebook and compare your life to all of the perfect people out there…” or “Apply every piece of advice someone give you to your life immediately.” (Don’t we all find ourselves doing these very things and then going crazy over it?!)

And then we just shared stories about our kids and life.

They weren’t the “bragging” kind of stories. No, these were the real life, it isn’t easy and we all make mistakes, kind of stories.

Laughter filled the room, time and time again.

And as the time was coming to the close my friend next to me said something to the effect of “this was so much fun. I just feel better about myself as a mom and feel like I can go home now and better deal with my life.”

Isn’t that what community should be about?

A gathering where our joys are multiplied, and our sorrows divided. (<====Click to Tweet)

If we leave a time like this feeling better about ourselves, it is so so worth it.

It wasn’t really about the food or the cake (although both were amazing), it was about shared heart-stories and women gathering to support and love one of their own.

I need more of that in my life.

I need to make it a priority to spend time with other women, in community. Because when I do I walk away with a lighter spirit and a song in my step.

Laughter truly is the best medicine!

Photo Credit: a4gpa

Neighboring Well

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ArtOfNeighboring

It was clear that she was “new”. As a new dance mom myself and just a few months into the routine, I could tell that she was attending drop off for the first time. I raised 3 boys before we had a chance to welcome a girl into our family, so this dance mom thing is new territory for me.

And can I just say it is a bit intimidating.

Maybe it is just women in general, we can come off as illusive and unapproachable. I do the same, I make myself busy with my phone so that I don’t have to make conversation with a “stranger.”

As an introvert and shy to boot, it is work for me to join a conversation, to make friends.

It isn’t comfortable, it never is, but I am learning that sometimes God calls us to step out of our comfort zones and do something different.

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My friend Kristin Schell is doing that with her #theturquoisetable movement.  I love this idea and can’t wait to get a table this spring. Recently she told me about another book that captures this idea of neighboring well.

The Art of Neighboring arrived at my door yesterday and I started reading it as I was getting ready this morning. If I didn’t have to be at work, I would be on the couch reading this. I had flagged pages and underlined in the Foreword. Oh it is going to be good.

“I am convinced that living in close community with our neighbors is the best way to live. The command to love our neighbors lies at the core of God’s plan for our lives, and when we follow this mandate, it changes everything. The journey begins when we choose a lifestyle of conversation and community over a lifestyle of busyness and accumulation. It’s about making room for life and choosing to befriend those God has placed around us.” p11

So often we make assumptions about people. We wave and smile as we drive down our neighborhoods, but it doesn’t go beyond that. And when we haven’t taken the time to really get to know someone, we assume we know what happens in their homes. Good, bad or otherwise…we don’t really know.

“Perhaps we’d find that the people on our block are normal people just like us. They go to work, hang out with their kids, and put their pants on one leg at a time. At the end of the day, they long for a place to belong, a place to be accepted and cared for. They want to do something significant with their lives, something that really matters. What good things might happen if you truly got to know the people in your neighborhood and they got to know you?” p18

These words put a lump in my throat.

If there are people in my neighborhood that are looking for a place to belong, and I can do something about it – what is stopping me? As a believer in Jesus, isn’t this my calling?

Love your neighbor as yourself.

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I am telling you that this isn’t going to be easy for me. My heart beats fast at considering hitting publish to these words, knowing that my neighbors may read them…people in my church. I don’t want to be someone who talks the talk and is afraid to walk the scary road ahead of me.

But this idea of better community, or neighboring well is hitting me on all sides and I can’t ignore it or assume that someone else will do the hard work.

So once again, with knees knocking, I step forward willing to let God use me. (<====Click to Tweet)

As I headed back to the dance studio to pick up my girl, I saw the new mom waiting…phone in hand, scrolling, because it is what we do.

And I turned and said hello, asked if they were new to Marshall, or just new to dance? They had just moved here for a job, new community and new people. Another mom joined the conversation and she also has been here only 2 years “And I don’t know anyone.”

I want that to change! So in a few minutes we stopped and share “newbie” stories and next week maybe that conversation can continue.

We don’t have to do this alone, we shouldn’t do this alone.

It will likely be baby steps for me, but they will be steps forward, to learning the art of neighboring, and neighboring well.

Will you join me?

Photo Credit: From The Art of Neighboring

When Technology Connects

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Map

I think I loved the idea of developing friendships, creating community even at a young age.

My parents would take us on travel adventures when I was little. Driving across the US in our van or VW bus, we filled our time with road games, latch-hook and Sesame Street song tapes.

When we would arrive at our destination, usually a campground, we would find the best spot and set up camp. Back in those days we camped in an actual tent, like on the ground. You know where bugs and bears can get you…ahh the good times! 😉 It was always fun and I have fond memories of those summers with my family.

Every once and awhile I would meet another girl my age who was out with her family. One year a girl from California parked next door. I say parked because her parents had a HUGE camper, and it even had a toilet inside. I was only slightly jealous.

She and I had fun exploring together and at the end of our stay we exchanged addresses and promised to write letters.  

The letters came frequently at first, but then as school got back in session, and life happened…well the letters stopped.

Today, because of the amazing technology we have, staying connected is so much easier.

I have marveled recently at how, through things like Voxer, women from all over the country have been able to develop friendships that will remain lifelong. A message, or a prayer can be shared in moments and suddenly they don’t feel so far away.

Some of my dearest friends are those that live the farthest from me.

A book launch originally connected us, and then emails, a sharing of life and laughter and even at times tears. We start our mornings with a greeting and prayer requests. These women have invested in me and I in them, in ways I could have never imagined even 10 years ago.

While technology can be, at times, a curse…today I see the blessings.

Because of technology, I now look at a map of the United States and realize that even though the States separate us, the gap doesn’t feel too big because with a touch of a button we can leave a vox, or send an email…and we stay connected.

How do you stay connected with technology? 

I’m sharing this story with this week’s community link-up at The High Calling. You can add your voice to the “Technology at Work” discussion here.

Photo Credit: Marxchivist