Linking up with Lisa Jo again this week to participate in Five Minute Friday.

Today’s word is IMAGINE– ready, set go –

When I think about the word Imagine – immediately I think about the following verse from Ephesians….

Ephesians 3:16-21

The Voice (VOICE)

New life is blooming all around us. Especially now, we see evidence of it. What once seemed dead from the dark of winter, starts to show the smallest of growth.

Sometimes that growth happens quickly and there are big changes in a short amount of time….

This picture was taken just a week after the first – so much growth had occurred it surprised me!

And today I am thinking about the growth and change that has happened to me over the past 6 months. I am humbled that I was given the chance to be a part of this God Sized Dream team.

When I initially saw the  email with the opportunity to apply, I had no idea I would be chosen, and no concept of how much this process would change me.

Initially I was asked what I thought God’s dream for me was. I believed it was to have a space to encourage other women, share my own failures and offer hope to a fuller life with Christ.

Believe me when I tell you, just because I feel that is ultimately my dream…doesn’t mean that I have it all together! I don’t set myself out as an expert in doing it right, because I struggle to maintain my own life well most days! 🙂

But what I have discovered is that in this process of growth  there is also a dying as well.

On the ground all around the bush photographed above were blooms that had already fallen off.

You see I believe that to grow, there also has to be a dying of ones self. We can’t keep all the “old” if we want to be made new.

That is one of the biggest things that I have discovered about myself. That I have to be willing to let go of some of my old behaviors and defense mechanisms, if I want to be able to share honestly about God’s redeeming Grace and change in my life.

I have to shed those parts of me so that even more beautiful “fruit” can grow.

So while I had hoped to be farther along after 6 months than I am today, I believe that I am right where I am supposed to be.

While it was my hope to encourage others with my faith journey, I have found a group of women who have met that exact need in me. Something I wasn’t expecting at all, and a gift that means more to me than seeing the fulfillment of my own heart’s desires.

Yes this process has changed me. And I am so grateful for it.

What happens next?? Hopefully more growth, more opportunities to share how God has changed me and ultimately a space here to continue to share all of the mercies He has shown me. God is good ALL the time and I want to continue to shout that here!

What “season” do you find yourself in right now??

Join me in seeing how God has answered prayers and grown dreams by reading about the blessings other fellow dreamers have seen here.

Dreaming, stepping out in faith, takes risk. And there have been times when I have asked myself if it is worth it.

Not everyone is going to support our efforts, or understand them. I think it is pretty safe to say that here in the Midwest – blogging is a bit of a mystery. Most of the people that I know, who also blog, live on the East or West coast. But here in the great state of MN I find fewer of us filling up the www.

So when I talk about having a place to encourage women, share my faith walk…well sometimes there are those that just don’t understand it all. Or those that think I am trying to be someone I am not…putting on a show of perfection because I blog about God. (Trust me perfection is not a word one uses in describing me!) 🙂

And I will be honest, sometimes that hurts my very thin skin.  I am a pretty sensitive person and can really take things personally…it is a blessing and a curse! 🙂

I have had a tough few weeks personally. I am struggling and growing (I think) and it hasn’t been easy. I am unable to share details but I have been given the opportunity to be a part of something from the ground up. Something I had dreamed about but never believed I could be a part of….

It is scary and overwhelming and jumping up and down exciting all at once. It has nothing to do with me at all – it is all God. And as I have talked with a few other women involved, I am amazed at what is happening and coming together so quickly. Only God…..

But as I step out in faith I find myself under attack. I don’t know what you think about the enemy…but I believe that he is threatened by people who want to share God’s redemptive grace with the world….and will stop at nothing to create an environment of fear and doubt.

Feeling particularly vulnerable last night and honestly ready to give up on it all, this blog, the dream team….I reached out to a fellow dreamer and amazing friend. And today, just when I needed it most her response email came in my inbox and filled my heart with the Truth.

We ARE going to be tested. But take heart because we are not alone and even Jesus is praying for us! Luke 22:31-32 “Simon, stay on your toes. Satan has tried his best to separate all of you from me, like chaff from wheat. Simon, I’ve prayed for you in particular that you not give in or give out. When you have come through the time of testing, turn to your companions and give them a fresh start.”

Jesus tells us that Satan will try and separate us from Him…but He is interceding for us and gives us hope that we will come through the times of testing…and when we do we should support someone in the same situation.

Today I was reminded more than ever that it IS worth the risk. Why? Because community with all of you is more than I had hoped for or imagined. Receiving an email or card of encouragement from a friend at just the right time reminded me that God loves the little details of my life too.

He chose some select people to show me how much He loves me…sinful, hypocritical, broken me. I was in tears at the intricate way this community has been woven together.

Does everyone “get” it? Nope probably not….and honestly I feel sorry for those who haven’t had the chance to experience community in this way. My life is continually changed by it.

Whatever your dream, you are bound to experience fears and doubts and even lies from the enemy. You may ask yourself if taking that leap of faith is worth it?

I can tell you from experience that any pain in the growth periods, the trials and testing, will be so worth it in the long run. Because I have come to see God in a way that I didn’t before…a more personal way and I am so grateful for it!

What are those things that you feel are too risky in regards to your dream?? I would love to hear about them so that I could be praying for you as others have prayed for me!!

And if you want to join other dreams talking about their risky business… 😉 jump on over to Holley’s and check out some of my beautiful teammates posts as well!!

I am a bit of a Type A…ok that’s a lie. I am a HUGE perfectionist. And if I am honest about it, it isn’t because I am as concerned about the “final product” as much as how I am perceived by all of you.

It stings a little to admit that to you….because it isn’t a part of my heart that I am proud of. But it is a part of my heart that becomes more and more apparent to me as I walk with Christ.

I want you all to think that I have it together. I want my children to behave in public and never throw fits. I want my children to be successful and strong and confident. And while those last things are good character traits to have – I have to look at the reason I desire those things for them.

If it is so that I look good as a mother – then I am missing the point. This morning I came across a video recording of Angie Smith taking at her church Crosspoint this past Mother’s Day. Here is the link to the “pinned” You Tube version. It is worth the 36 min to watch it!

She talked about that God desires us to know His love for us and to communicate THAT to our children.…not the “conditional” love that I often show them. The “you do good and make me look good and then mom will be happy” kind of love.

Have you ever been there?

Admittedly I have, maybe it wasn’t my hearts intent….but the way I communicate with them may just convey that message exactly.

And this just after I had another “perfectionist” moment this morning.

We got a call that it had been many years since our county had done a full assessment of our property and could they come out this morning to look at the inside of the house. They are basically just looking for improvements etc…

So when I got up this morning (on my day off) I started cleaning and picking up. Perfecting the beds, folding blankets, vacuuming, cleaning the bathroom, putting the “fancy” pillows on the bed. I KNOW, for crying out loud people!! I have a serious problem.

Yes it is good to have a clean house. Generally I try and keep it that way. But do I really believe that this dude (can I call him a dude? I think so)…anyways this dude doesn’t care if the toy room is clean, or the bathroom mirrors are spotless.

98% of the time it just doesn’t look that way in my house. As much as I wish it did….we have kids, they are messy, we are busy and something ALWAYS needs to be done.

This is the picture I want to convey to you…

Pillows perfectly placed, floor clean of toys and cat hair, juice cups in the sink…neat and tidy, welcoming and inviting…

What you will likely find in my home at any given moment instead is this…

Unsupervised for even a few minutes….my children can make a mess! 🙂 And as I write this, the mess is still there. 🙂

And I think that is how my faith walk can look at times too. I want to be the Christian that is all neat and tidy and put together, while being warm and inviting and a person to be comfortable with.  The condition of my heart though can often reflect the mess of the 2nd picture.

I have a short temper and I don’t spend nearly enough time reading the Bible or in communion with God. So how can I expect my outside to be a perfect reflection of Christ’s love for me if my insides are a mess?

Our time here on earth is short. We don’t know what tomorrow holds. Why do we waste so much time pretending to be someone we can’t be in the first place, instead of truly seeking out God in ALL things and developing the Godly character that He desires in all of us?

My life is often a mess. But because it is, I am more fully aware of my need for a Savior, and so very grateful that Christ died for someone like me.

Embrace the mess and seek God with your whole life and be at peace as He changes you bit by messy bit!

Linking up with Lisa Jo again this week to participate in Five Minute Friday.

Today’s word is SONG– ready, set go –

Music has always played a big part in my worship to God.  There was a time many years ago when our family was broken. We were hurting and stubborn and selfish. Attending church was something we just didn’t do – our pride kept us away. But I missed that time of worship.

And so on my 45 minute commute to work each day I would turn up my radio to the Christian station in my area and sing. I LOVE to sing. And while I am no recording artist – God has given me a gift of song. And I love that I can honor Him with singing praises to Him.

Sometimes the song in our hearts is all we can offer Him. When everything else around me was telling me to give up. The words to praise songs filled my heart and my head with Truth.

Chris Tomlin is one of my favorite artists and his most recent album is amazing. The words of this song is constantly playing in my mind. I am including a link below so you can check it out for yourself!

http://www.godtube.com/watch/?v=0902E1NU

What song is playing in your heart right now?