Today is World Suicide Prevention Day. I have mixed feelings about the name because if we could have prevented Isaac’s death by suicide, we would have done anything to do so. We did do everything we knew to love him, fight for him, support him and encourage him.  

As a survivor of suicide loss, I have had to wrestle with the guilt, shame and feelings of failure that accompany this loss. Ultimately, we know we did everything we could. Yes, he had an illness of the mind, but he was an incredible human. Isaac was kind and compassionate. He loved his family, especially his siblings. He was smart and worked hard at his job and took pride in what he was learning. He also wasn’t perfect, I know that. We had hard years and hurts between us but with God’s grace we experienced forgiveness and redemption in our relationship. Isaac struggled to be honest about how he was feeling. He often took on the responsibility of other people’s problems and put aside his own. That was his downfall.

On a day devoted to understanding and bringing awareness to suicide prevention, it is my prayer that we could all be willing to be more honest about our struggles. Find even one person to share the ugly with so that you know you are not alone. Invite someone else into the mess of your life so that in those dark moments when your mind is trying to tell you that you are the only one and you are alone and that leaving is the only option….you will know those are all lies and you will remember how important it is that you stay. You are loved, you are valued and you are needed. So please stay. #worldsuicidepreventionday